Physical and Mental Issues...

I had a great experience that made me feel that I am actually making some progress with communication with my students. I was going to try to give some diections about the students homework and wasn't even going to try and just tell Ann to have her tell the kids in Thai. Well, I just went for it any way and after I was finished (and I talked slowly and used as many hand gestures as I could!), Ann asked the students if they understood what I said. Two kids raised their hands and explained to Ann what they thought I said and they were right on! I almost got goosebumps. I think the kids are really getting used to be and we are starting to click. As most of my family and friends would say, I am a fast talker...but this experience has taught me to really slow down.

The power goes out every now and then at the school. James said it is because we use too much power and the breaker blows. It usually takes a few hours to fix...which means no AC in the classrooms, which is quite unbearable. I am very thankful for the AC in our classrooms because my friend who teaches at the high school doesn't have AC.

Ann's (my thai translator) husband plays on the Singburi Football Club team so I went to a couple games with her. It was loud and crazy and alot of fun!

I will never get over how people in southeast Asia make every trip worth it...when they haul something, they don't mess around!

Unfortunately I still found myself in this rut and was not my normal perky, smiley self. I didn't like the person I was, but I felt I couldn't do anything about it. Usually after a few hours of a mood like this I just tell myself it's not worth it so I move on and am happy again...but not this time. It felt out of my hands. I was working so much to try to keep from being lonely but it just made me more depressed. On top of all of this, I started feeling a problem in my ear. The feeling was one like you needed to pop your ears, either from water or like being on a plane....except I couldn't pop them. Over 2 weeks it continued to get worse. I wasn't in pain, but I couldn't hear hardly anything from the "outside," everything was just loud on the inside of my head. It was extremely frustrating to teach like this because my voice was very loud inside my head even though I wasn't actually talking that loud. All of the students noise just bounced around inside my head and made me dizzy. I wasn't too worried because I wasn't in pain, but after 3 weeks I started getting worried that there would be permanent damage. So I talked to nurse Polly, who made me feel better, but also worried me about the possibilities of what it could be. I was not excited to go to the hospital where I knew communication would be minimal.

The organiztion and structure of the hospital was quite something. This is the door for the ear, nose and throat problems. At one point I was inside the room where patients were getting looked at by the doctor. Also, you take your blood pressure and weight.

It was a scary, sureal experience. I got taken into this room, where I was put into this sound proof box where they did numerous hearing tests. After it was all said and done I was told I had conductive hearing loss in my right ear (as if I knew what that meant!) and I was given 4 prescriptions. I did not feel better when I left the hospital. It took almost a whole week before I felt any better from the drugs. I went back for a checkup and the doctor said I was better and gave me a few more drugs. I am still not 100%, but I feel I'm on the way to recovery. I am still very frustrated by the fact that I have no idea what caused it or why it happened. I have never really had any medical issues, even small ones, and let me tell you it is not fun to deal with those on your own in a place far away from the home you love. I was absolutely overwhelmed by the emails and thoughts of concern I received from my home community. I felt blessed to feel that so many people care about me and my well-being.

I did some more motorbike riding into the country to find some more interesting Buddhist statues.  I knew that umbrellas were important to the Thais (to stay out of the sun), but I didn't know they were also important to the Buddhas!

It wasn't until after I got home and put this next picture on my computer that I saw the swastika on this Buddhas chest. After doing some research I learned that this symbol dates from the Neolithic Era and means good luck or good well-being. It is used in many religions such as Buddhism and means dharma, universal harmony and the balance of opposites....so a bit different from the negative connotations that Hitler gave it!

This guy was the "guard" of the temple I visited.

This next picture is of the fattest Buddha I have ever seen! I seriously think that I could have fit my head inside his belly button! I was going to try but I didn't want to get kicked out by the monks!

There are two things in life that I have no tolerance for and could do without...(and this is before I moved to Thailand!)....mosquitos and spiders! I get probably about 3-6 bites a day. I always thought I would be safe in our AC classrooms, but the mosquitos thrive in there. I have to put on bugspray every morning! As I was teaching one morning, writing on the white board, I all of a sudden noticed, about 6 inches from my hand, a spider about 3 inches in diameter! I might have let out a squeal which got a response of laughter from my students! My first reaction was to grab my shoe outside the door and smash it and right as I was going to suggest this to Tuk, my translator, I realized that Buddhists don't believe in killing even small creatures like that (unless it's to eat I think!). So she just made it move out of sight, behind the board. I was not pleased and kept my distance from the board! This happened about 3 weeks ago and the kids still come up to me and say spider, spider! I had another encounter in the other classroom with an even bigger spider and again it was not met with the hostility I felt! I should have remembered the picture I saw when learning about Buddhism....a person was about to step on an ant and then an elephant was about to step on the person!

Spoiled...

There have been many things I have felt the urge to complain about since I have moved to Thailand. They are mostly complaints about how the classroom is ran and the disorganization, etc. But, the other day I realized that I am actually spoiled. I have heard of foreign teachers not having any translators at all in their classrooms and I got to experience that first hand. Both Ann and Tuk were gone and I basically had to fend for myself! I don't think I have ever been so frustrated in my life! It was very overwhelming and exhausting!

One of our students parents own a fantastic resturant (and they have a picture menu so I can just point even though I don't know what it is and it's not in English!). Since the first time we went they have never let us pay. We always feel bad and leave money anyway. Without a doubt, every day after we eat there, we get bakery goods or fruit or some little treat from them when they pick up their student from school! Again, the kindness and hospitality I have felt in Thailand is heartwarming.

I'm going to throw in some random pictures so you don't get bored!

This farmer was grazing his cattle right across the road from my house.

Well, the lonliness finally set in...and it has not been fun for me. I read this short book by Lynn Miller, who is well known in the Mennonite Church and I just wanted to point out a few interesting points from his book. He said that we should take vacations as short term volunteer service opportunities. I like that concept because we can still get out and see some of the country or world and learn so much about other people and help them by giving of our time; one of our most precious commodities. Lynn said that in the book of James it talks about how to be complete you need to have trials, troubles and stuggle in order to develop and grow. I have come to realize that I haven't had a hard life at all. Even when I complain about things here I  realize that they just seem tough sometimes because of my lack of trials and tribulations I've had in my life so far. When I reflect, I realize I have shelter, food to eat and I'm not physically struggling, so it can't be that bad right? It's just emotional and mental struggle that I feel now....which is not something I would wish on anyone. It's a discouraging feeling to feel all alone with no one to talk to....that isn't a million miles away! I spend too much time alone with my thoughts...and over think things. So to try to get over it, I'm just trying to work constantly...even for a few hours when I get home from work after supper...which has now lead to a different sort of feeling...where all I do is work and sleep and that I'm not truly enjoying myself. I'm hoping this is just a bit of a rut while I'm getting over the half way point.

These are the stands that you see set up everywhere; they line the streets.  I still don't understand that even when these ladies are in the shade, they are fully covered and have their face masks and hats on! I would die from heat exhaustion!

So I finally figured out the population of Singburi! 19,470...which is way bigger than I thought because it doesn't feel that big. This is why I've been trying to take my motorbike and cruise around out into the country side and through the town so I can get to know it a bit better. I had an interesting conversation with James on my way to pick up my work permit (finally after 6 months of being here!). We got on the topic of global warming some how...and he is not completely sold on it he said! He said that people in Thailand feel like it's getting hotter because there is getting to be more and more AC and because there are alot less trees (for shade) because of more cement being put down. Interesting point I thought. I told him that regardless of whether the severity of global warming is being exaggerated, there are still alot of good steps being taken to reduce waste and help the state of the globe. He agreed.

Here are some students at lunch time paying their respect to Buddah.

Phonetics is something that you really have to stress when teaching English as a foreign language. Especially to a people with a language that don't have some of the sounds that we have. The Thai people say there "r's" like "l's" and vice versa. So when you say Singburi, it almost sounds like Singbuli. I had the hardest time getting my 1st graders to make the "th" sound, like in Math or three. It seemed they could only do "s" or "f" sounds. I feel I made the "th" sound roughly 50 times and ended going around individually to each student to hear them say it and try to correct them!

This one is of my students working so diligently on a Math activity!

For the first time since I've been here I went to church. The computer teacher at school has a husband who is a pastor. I knew I wouldn't be able to understand much of anything, but I thought I'd give it a shot! Klu Kheng didn't come with because of something a man in the church said to her. It saddens my heart to hear the things that "Christians" say to each other and the things they do sometimes. There were only 22 people in this little room. I introduced myself and then they prayed for me. They sang many, many songs, read numerous scriptures (which I was able to follow along because Klu Kheng gave me her English/Thai Bible), a few times of prayer and a short message. During one of the songs (which were all unison), I heard a girl behind me break out some harmony and it warmed my soul! I did have a man sit next to me who translated a few things now and then. I'm not sure what denomination this church is, but I thought it might be neat to be a sister church to them and support them, get them Bibles and help them increase their congregation.

At Klu Khengs house she showed me her piano (electric) and a few books she had. One was a hymnal and when I paged through it there were many songs that we have in the Mennonite hymnal! I thought maybe one Sunday I could play some hymns for them! Klu Khengs daughters are named Alpha and Omega. Whenever I go into her computer class, she always brings up God and being a christian. She said to me, I understand that I need to have patience and that God doesn't answer my prayers right away. It's always an interesting and good time to chat with her.

Here are some pictres of some temples I went to visit.

This is what some of their tombs look like or what they use when people die.

And then there were two.....

It was a sad day for me when my friend Cailin, who I had become very close with over the past 6 months, living together and teaching together, was leaving and going back to America. I have never spent so much time together with anyone in my life! We agreed that we even spent more time together than a married couple, because of the fact that we not only lived together but worked together every day and hungout everyday! I definitely share something with Cailin that I don't share with any other human being. It was a surreal day when it was her last day at school. When James told our 2nd grade class, there were many tears shed. Almost all of the girls were crying and even one or two boys! And of course the boys who weren't crying were making fun of everyone who WAS crying!

The actual day that we loaded up all of her stuff in the taxi to take her to the bus station to Bangkok was very strange. Just as quickly as she walked into my life, she walked out! We agreed that we would make an effort to see each other again. That first week after she left I kept thinking she would walk into the room, whether at school or home....and of course, it didn't happen! Since she has been gone I have working more and trying to stay really busy so as to not get lonely. So far it is working! So now it is down to me and Steve, who teaches at the high school, for farangs I know in Singburi!

Klu (teacher) Kheng, who is our computer teacher at school, decided to take a photo shoot of Cailin and I one day, so the next few pictures are in honor of Cailin! I miss you!

Our student Bai-Tong, Mai, Mint, Mind, Kong, Ninee and Maprow.

So a few times I have heard some Thai people, or Laos and Vietnam people, complain about the heat or being hot. I find this very interesting because when I look at them they have long sleeves, jackets or sweaters on! I would be hot too in 90 plus degree weather dressed like that! But again, they are so worried about getting dark, because that is a sign of being poor, or of a lower class manual labor person.

Everything seems to be cleared up in Bangkok but I asked James if we have anything to worry about in the future. What he said did not really put me at ease! He said that we (meaning he is for the red shirts) are not done. He said that before they were non-violent, but that might changed. He talked about how the red shirts might use bombs in the future (not to kill but to scare or prove a point), that they might kidnap political people or that there might be people trying to assassinate certain political leaders. I'm not sure when this would start happening again, but I didn't like the sound of it! The current leader they want out of power is supposed to be in control until November 2011, but the red shirts want him out now. Time will tell I guess.

We had a teacher appreciation day and assembly at school. It is a day when the students are able to show their thanks and appreciation to their teachers and also learn the proper forms of respect towards their teachers. This next picture shows some of the flowers that all of the students had to have for the assembly. In this picture are some of my new 1st graders: Film, Zoom, Nine, Peam, Mix, Formost, Zine and Boss.

There were about 500-600 students packed into this building. At the beginning of the assembly the students were doing some sort of chant or song and bowing. I asked another teacher what the chant was about and she told me that the students were asking Buddah to give them wisdom and knowledge and to be good students. The students were then reminded or taught the proper way to put your hands together and to bow.  The whole time this was going on I was standing in shock, watching this teacher go around and yell at kids and smack them when they weren't doing it properly. This wasn't a light love tap either! I felt so bad for these kids and wanted to tell this lady she can't do that.....but I was too afraid of getting smacked myself!

Different groups of students would come up to the stage where the teachers were sitting and bring bouquets of flowers to give to the teachers. I got to receive the flowers for our grade 2 class. Then the students would bow to the teachers to show respect.

That afternoon James wanted to do a little more teaching to the students to show them how to be respectful to their teachers. At the end I had to sit at the front of the class on a little chair and each of the students came up to me, got on their knees and bowed and said thank you. It was a very bizarre experience. It made me uncomfortable for some reason. I guess I feel that I'm not so special that people should be bowing at my feet!

This is me with Ann, my Thai translator and our Pratom 2 class.

This is me with Tuk, my Thai translator, and our Pratom 1 class.